Alternative adult hookups dating a closeted man
As I came of age in the late 1960s and early 1970s, I had a few flings I later regretted. That’s also how young people learn to negotiate relationships.
And compared to previous generations, today’s young adults spend more time single.
Compared with sober lovers, those who are drunk are substantially less likely to use contraception. Any romantic/sexual coupling can generate feelings of hurt and regret, but a study at Syracuse University suggests that, far from feeling victimized, women who hook up are typically assertive actors.
(Not to mention that as intoxication increases, erotic pleasure usually decreases.) Incidentally, alcohol lubricates not just young adult hook-ups but also a great deal of sex among lovers of all ages. Older adults uncomfortable with hook-ups assert that they reflect young men’s fantasies of porn-style, free-for-all sex, while denying young women’s preference for committed relationships. The researchers (Fielder & Carey, 2010) asked 118 women undergraduates why they’d hooked up: in what my generation called one-night stands.
And they show that most young people feel fine about their hook-ups: These studies also show that hook-up regret is most likely in one specific circumstance—intercourse when very drunk.
As previously mentioned, about a third of hook-ups involve intercourse, and the participants are very drunk in around half of those.